Monday, September 12, 2011

After the resit and tanglung festival

I may not good in my result compared to others ..I was used to be so want to had success in my life and forgot about the help of God in my life in the past .... I used to do thing with myown strength and ability.... I also used to be so childish purposely or not purposely.. The joy in my heart had been lost and dun know how to go back to fountain of joy.... UNTIL one day , I had failed in my final exam wat a suffer I had ... I keep said to God why this and why that .. totally din realise wat I had done wrong in the past ..... For the preparation for my resit, again I go back to God's side. On that time, I suddenly realised that my heart had unexplainable peace and joy in my heart. I really understand this time that I had done so many mistake towards God who am I to Him but He poured His love towards me like never ending .... On the day the result release, I was so happy not because I had passed the exam..It was the thing I had learned to rely on Him more and more .... I start listening to God's voice and eye of my heart had been opened again... This time I really dun know wat to say ... it is speechless for me... My cell group leader had told me that when we start honour God , God will honour us back... We are like person who lost way and dun know how good we are in the presence of God... We used to take God's grace for granted ... We usually think God must give me this and give me that ....Will we faithful to God again when all blessing and grace taken away..Just like Job when all his belonging , blessing was taken away by God ..In the book of Job..... This wat I had learn from this test.. I had nothing but the glory and the praise I had let all those glory and praise give to our Lord Jesus Christ

I actually in shock when I arrived at the KLIA and knew my grandfather had passed away three months ago... I was start crying and blaming myself actually... If I pass my final then I can come back and see him for the last time... At that time I really collapse... I think I am useless who am I the eldest grandson also cannot do anything for me... however I think why should I sad ... I should rejoice cause my grandfather had leave the world and went to heaven where the place full of peace , joy and free of any disease. This time the mid autumn festival was unique for me.... I flashed back how my grandfather bought me the tanglung and mooncake when I was child .... Help me to buy my favourate tanglung the doraemon and ultraman one ..... The story that my grandfather told me...... Now I only realise that said by the chinese 当你要孝敬一位长辈已不在.... My heart was pin by needle.... However I will grow stronger and better person that wat my grandfather want... not matter how hard the way in my future, I believe I can go through with God...........

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